Big Wave Surfer Salmon

OK, they are not really salmon. They are some of the world's best surfers, as depicted in the NY Times, waiting for a monster wave in very large, roiling surf on the North Shore of Oahu. Thirty to Fifty foot waves are predicted. Now pull back from the photo and take it all in at once. These surfers really are salmon headed upstream. The dream of the perfect wave seems to rank right up there with the urge to spawn as motivation. These guys are not just paddling up some major hills, they are risking life and limb, just like those Alaskan salmon swimming up the rapids amid the hungry grizzly bears.

The Big Wave competition was cancelled on Monday due to, what else, big waves. On Tuesday Greg Long nosed out Kelly Slater to win. The second day story includes several more great shots of, you guessed it, big waves.

Headline Crawl 7

U.S. Economy Lost Only 11,000 Jobs in November - As Good As News understands why this is actually good news, but aren't there 11,000 people out there saying, "ONLY?".

Pastrami's Canadian Rival - Really? That flat, ham-like breakfast meat that the Canadians duped us into buying by calling it "bacon" is now going after the pastrami market? What will they call it this time, Canadian Corn Beef?

Killer With Low I.Q. Executed in Texas - They couldn't find anyone in Texas with a high I.Q.? Execution not as inhumane as it sounds if you compare killer's I.Q. with Texas average instead of national average.

Hugh Hurt, Jr., Engineer Who Studied Motorcycle Accidents, Dies at 81 - a man predestined to his job: figuring out who hurt junior.

CIA Authorized to Expand Use of Drones in Pakistan - The tricky part is getting one sworn in as Pakistan's President.

Peru's Biggest Losers

Peru's Fat Stealing Gang, Crime or Cover Up? A gang of thieves slaughters Peruvians in the jungle, steals their fat, stores it in empty Inca Kola bottles and sells it to Italian buyers for $60,000 a gallon? I'm voting cover up. At those prices the fat gang could get rich with voluntary live donors on one trip to the Biggest Loser set. The Peruvian National Police Chief has just fired General Felix Murga, his chief criminal investigator, who claimed to have arrested the fat gang. Apparently some Peruvian officials now believe the fat gang story is a police fabrication to cover murder squads run by - surprise - the police. Because of the great detail in the original story - Inca Kola bottles, a specific per gallon price, Mafia buyers, who doesn't love this stuff - As Good As News is going with a slightly more complex version of the cover up analysis. First, the murder squads were law enforcement personnel extorting money from cocaine growers and/or dealers who are plentiful in the Peruvian jungle. Second, that fabulous cover story about gangs of fat thieves was composed by the very imaginative former Peruvian intelligence chief (and former de facto dictator) Vladimir Montesinos, who, from his plush jail cell, continues to manage a diverse, highly profitable, public/private partnership that takes every opportunity to abuse power for a buck (or a Peruvian New Sole). Third, General Murga is a fall guy, not necessarily an innocent fall guy, for an operation that includes at least a few active, senior government officials in addition to Montesinos.

GDL Status Report

Initial Report from the office of the provisional Secretary of Defense, Ginger Defense League:

Today's New York Time's story on the arrest of a handful of ginger baiting and beating bullies in Southern California provides a new level of visibility for the oppressed redhead - a great opportunity for fundraising and political action. It also creates great peril for the secret defense branch of the GDL. A brief update on current actions follows:

- Liason with local law enforcement in Southern California leads to arrests, excellent results achieved through secret, targeted communications with gingers holding senior LLE positions;

- Vigorous follow-up with NY Times required - See California: Boys Detained After Prank -would this be a "prank" if gays or African-Americans had been assaulted? This will require more than a letter to the editor, volunteers to assemble in alley behind shebeen 1AM tonight;

- Facebook Group "National Kick a Ginger Day, are you going to do it" finally taken down - how many Gingers had to die for this nightmare to end. Facebook executives totally unresponsive, usual "not responsible for content" bs - Ginger Bill Gates has expressed some interest in buying Facebook and dismissing current management team;

- Armament purchase negotiations are moving forward with consulting assistance from the Continuity IRA;

- In a joint initiative with the GDL Treasury, progress continues on obtaining a slice of Scottish North Sea oil revenues - Scotland's position as host to the highest per capita ginger population makes the GDL alliance a politically popular security measure in Scotland, but these funds will evaporate instantly if any hint of the GDL's undercover operations comes to light;

- Rupert Grint continues consideration of role as GDL spokesperson. Tight security for these meetings has, to date, averted all media coverage.

WFBI?

Blogger, Accused of Threatening U.S. Judges, Was Reportedly Paid by the F.B.I. - Internet radio host and blogger Hal Turner is about to stand trial for making death threats on Federal judges. His defense? The FBI made me do it.

"Turner's FBI connections began in 2003 with the Newark-based Joint Terrorism Task Force and continued on and off until this year, according to the newspaper [the Bergen Record]. He claims his postings and other inflammatory statements were part of an undercover operation to ferret out violent left-wing radicals."

Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh could not be reached for comment. A publicist who has worked with Mr. Beck on several past projects noted, "Glenn never told me anything about the FBI, but he was always saying the most provocative things, stuff that just didn't seem to make any sense. And then there was all the crying, like there was some great weight on his chest he just couldn't get out from under. Of course, if Glenn was using his show to set up right wing radicals, he would never be stupid enough to admit it. It would be like painting a target on his back."

An FBI spokesperson declined to comment on the New Jersey trial or any specific undercover action. She did confirm that the Bureau was always exploring for new paths to identify potential criminals before they acted and she could not rule out the possiblity of interagency cooperation between the Bureau and the National Endowment for the Arts.

The Ruby Sunrise

The Ruby Sunrise, produced by The Theater Project, features the intriguing story of a farm girl (Ruby) who nearly invents television, but instead produces and inspires a daughter (Lulu). Twenty-five years later Lulu writes her mother's story and fights the system to get the truth, not to confused with the facts, on the air. The story breezes through a lot of history: some early stirrings of women's liberation; the invention of television and it's anticipated impact on mankind - until TV's potential is fully realized as the perfect medium for the sale of soap; the blacklist; the Automat; and, with assistance from a projected backdrop, the real original Ray's Pizza. OK, the Automat and Ray's Pizza weren't all that central to the plot, but I was hungry. Through it all, Mother Ruby, daughter Lulu and some occasionally weak willed accomplices fight with persistent vision to overcome mankind's flaws, in a theme the script drives home a little too persistently at times. Fortunately, the believable characters, entertaining story and some advice on doing what you can realistically do from a drunken old character actress overcome any hint of preachiness.

The real joy here is the uniformly high quality of cast, direction and production. There are no weak links. Jenelle Sosa, as Ruby (Theater Project regulars will remember her extraordinary performance in Fully Committed), Jen Plants, as Lulu, and Rick Delaney, as Tad (veteran television writer who becomes the vehicle for Lulu's story, her lover and finally her coauthor) deserve special mention for outstanding performances in demanding roles - what the heck, so do Norleen Farley, who captured both the bitter old aunt and the alcoholic character actress to a T and Jaclyn Ingoglia who nailed the difficult task of playing a bad actress just badly enough so it was funny real, not funny farce.

Just two shows left, Saturday, Oct. 17 and Sunday, Oct. 18, 2009. See it at Union County College, Cranford, NJ. Brown Paper Tickets or 800 838 3006

Love Simple

Love Simple is an indie that's a romantic comedy with an ending, a real ending that resolves the story,not just a point in time when the film stops, a happy ending no less - is this possible? Before checking "indie" in your OED, take note. The other indie symptoms are all there: creative core of college pals; handheld camera; entire feature length film shot in 14 days with catering by Mom (bologna sandwich and lemonade anyone?). The result is well worth watching.

The primary romance features Adam and Seta. It might be love at first sight, but if truth is beauty, this is one ugly couple, as both lovers are lying through their teeth. Adam's a thirty-two year old undergrad living with his Dad. Seta is sick. Neither feels like facing the prospect of another quick dump. This could get treacly, especially given Seta's illness, but it's well paced and well played, particularly by Patrizia Hernandez, and the result is far more engaging than the average studio romance.

There's more love in the air here. Adam's pal Jesse has a one night stand with Seta's roomate Keith (Keith is the Brooklyn counterpart of a boy named Sue, played very capably as a comic straight man, er whatever, by Caitlin Fitzgerald.). Cynics Jesse and Keith then counsel Adam and Seta on the perils of romance while falling for each other. No spoiler alert lapse here, you will see this one coming from a mile away. Finally, Adam's life is on hold because he's caring for his sick father, a case of "simple" love that provides some interesting contrast.

The comedy is a little choppier than the romance, with more risk and greater potential. Writer/first time Director Mark Von Sternberg handles some gender reversal bits very deftly in the latter stages of the film, but the bro banter generally felt flat instead of funny. Several comic scenes were set up as potential diamonds, then mined for cubic zirconium. The visuals were consistently rewarding, but the funniest moments would have been better with a crisper set up and an occasional zinger. Only Israel Horowitz as James (Adam's father), seemed really at home delivering a humorous line. The comedy's not perfect, but promising. Several scenes were truly funny, even the cubic zirconium was pretty good and we will be forever grateful that Mr. Sternberg eschewed the Lucille Ball approach to the unmasking of Adam and Seta, settling for quick pain rather than a slow, and painfully unfunny, sequence of ever expanding embarrassment.

Love Simple is worth renting or seeing with a date. The trick is to find it. The linked site will have news on distribution.