Saturday, November 3, 2007

Headline Crawl 3

Pittsburgh Episcopal Diocese Votes to Leave Church - to attend Steeler Game

Ex-Astronaut Wins Ruling in Attack - This headline should read DIAPERS OUT AS TRIAL EVIDENCE. Comments during interrogation and the results of a car search will not be used as evidence in the assault trial of love triangle astronaut Lisa Nowak because Detectives minimized her Miranda rights and misled her during interrogation. Yes, sadly, the diapers will not appear at trial. Apparently the smell of moist diapers does not, in and of itself, constitute probable cause for a vehicle search.

Writer's Guild Set to Strike - Studio executives remain calm, they are still sitting on a reservoir of comic book super heroes and sixties TV shows that they can turn into movies for the rest of the decade. Watch for a Top 4 on David Letterman Monday.

Thousands Rally Against Georgia's Once Popular President - OK, the new book stinks, but Jimmy Carter deserves better.

Clinton Retreats on Issues of Men vs Women -Announces settlements in Paula Jones vs Clinton, Monica Lewinsky vs Clinton, Kathleen Willey vs Clinton, offers hush money to Gennifer Flowers, Dolly Browning, Sally Perdue, Elizabeth Gracen.

We leave the Tabasco flood to Jay Leno.

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